Coaching

Sexual Coaching for Individual and Relationship Health

Is your relationship with your sexuality preventing you from living a fulfilled and happy life?

Sexuality is our most primal, basic need. It drives us at a cellular level and is, in some ways, our reason for being. Because it is so fundamental, our sexuality is profoundly influenced by our life experiences and in turn, deeply affects our psychological character, which further affects our sexuality. This continuous interplay means that each of us has a unique profile of sexual needs and responses with the potential to span a very wide range.

Our modern society, however, is reluctant to discuss sexuality in an open manner, preferring that it remain a subject shrouded in secrecy. This lack of discussion means that we feel alone and anxious about sexual feelings that seem to deviate from the norm or that others don’t seem to understand. We expend considerable energy to push those feelings down into our sub-conscious.

For many this situation is made worse because the confusion is compounded by a violation of personal space and sexual boundaries through rape, sexual harassment and bullying. Additional energy is used to ignore the fear that has been instilled by this violation. Each relationship becomes overshadowed by the memory.

But constant repression of sexual needs and fears, continued uncertainty about how to connect with a partner and unrelenting worry about being judged exact a price. The mind and body retains the negative energies of the emotions, turning them into yet more stresses until your fear ends up controlling your life. You become your own jailer, locked into a prison of isolation and shame.

For those grappling with repression or rejection of their sexual needs the following symptoms are common:
  • Loss of confidence/self-esteem
  • Feelings of shame and betrayal
  • Feelings of not being loved by your partner
 
  • Inability to form trusting relationships
  • Feelings of profound loneliness
  • Feelings of abnormality
For those suffering the aftermath of sexual violation the following symptoms are common:
  • Depression
  • Anxiety and panic attacks
  • Post-traumatic stress
  • Dependence on stimulants
  • Aggression
  • Withdrawal and isolation
  • Suicidal thoughts
 
  • Insomnia
  • Nightmares
  • Inability to trust or establish intimacy
  • Powerlessness
  • Headaches
  • Fatigue or loss of motivation
  • Eating disorders (weight loss or gain)

To heal psychological traumas from sexual violation, I offer breath work sessions for individuals and groups. The group sessions are only for women.

Sexual Coaching for Individual and Relationship Health

I have 15 years of professional experience in sexual relationships, with particular emphasis on sexuality as expressed through power exchange, also known as domination or BDSM.

During this time, I have had many clients who have struggled to come to terms with their sexual needs and who have felt constrained in their relationships with others, fearing that their personal sexual freedom could never be accepted. Men and women who have felt forced to live a double life at considerable psychological cost to themselves and those around them.

Feelings of guilt and shame at our sexual needs or those of our partners put up barriers to living lives that are happy and free. Inability to discuss these needs can cause a breakdown of otherwise healthy relationships.

The objective of my coaching, is to help you bring yourself to a clear awareness of your sexuality and the context in which you can achieve sexual fulfillment. We will explore different elements of sexuality, guilt, shame, freedom and the meaning and definition of boundaries.

Ultimately I want to provide you with tools that you can use going forward on a journey to becoming a happier person who is passionate and fulfilled. After our coaching sessions you will be on the path to loving rather than oppressing yourself. You will knows how to negotiate boundaries in your relationships and stand up for your needs.

I offer two types of sexuality coaching.

Personal Sexuality  
This coaching is for people who feel alone with their sexuality (whether you are single or in a relationship) and feel unable to discuss their needs with their partners. It is right for you if you have ever asked yourself questions like the following:

  • Are my sexual needs and fantasies abnormal and/or disgusting?
  • I feel like no one else will ever understand me, am I the only one in the world who feels this way?
  • If my real sexual needs were discovered, wouldn’t my partner think worse of me?
  • How can I get a relationship to work when there is such a huge gap between my sexuality and the sexuality of others?
  • How can I live a full life without every knowing sexual fulfillment?
  • Which is better, to be unfaithful to my partner in order to experience sexual fulfillment or to suppress my sexual needs?

Fee (per person): 60 minutes – 1,000 kr

Partner Sexuality
This coaching is for people who have a partner with sexual needs that they feel they can not fulfill. It is right for you if you have ever asked yourself questions like the following:

  • How my partner can be turned on and fulfilled by these types of sex acts?
  • My partner’s sexual wishes and fantasies make me uncomfortable, but I want to make this relationship work, what can I do?
  • How can I have a healthy relationship in which I feel sexually forced?
  • My partner wants us to open up to others sexually, but I just can’t do that – what do I do?
  • How do I deal with the feeling that I am insufficient sexually and the worry that my partner may be unfaithful because of it?

Fee (per couple): 60 minutes – 1,600 kr